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So Much in Front of Me

Sometimes it’s hard to realize that as Americans, and especially for those that want it, have so much in front of us. Cliche rephrase: the sky is the limit.

And with so little time in a day, I feel like I miss a lot of that opportunity-grasping gap. This post is to remind me of a few things I want to accomplish this year personally (so outside all that job-hunting, GPA-inflating bullshit).

1) I want to finally eat right and get fit. People always say that and especially me. But I haven’t budged a muscle since 9th grade Lacrosse and I’m really starting to feel it. So baby steps for now: healthy meals and just a few light trips to the gym a week.

2) I want to start an academic blog. I feel like throughout the day, especially during class, I have so many epiphany moments, or at least subjects that I have a lot of insight on and would love to share them with at least my future self. I get too lazy to write these down and I regret it because I already forgot the genius-idea I had a few hours ago.

3) I want to make sure everything is neat and ready for tomorrow, before I sleep. It’s something every mom tries to teach their kid and only half of them soak it up. I was part of the half that couldn’t retain a single request and I realize now that I could probably save about an hour of my life everyday if I were truly organized.

Just a few of the things I want to work on. I can’t remember the rest because I haven’t written them down. My memory is really going to shits nowadays. I don’t wanna blame it on aging but what else can it be? The only other possibility is that I’m over capacity. My brain is filled with Harry Potter facts, spongebob quotes, exact color names, prices of everything in the world, memories of every moment of my life up to the age of 18. I wish we could spring clean our minds…

Fight or Flight

This uncertainty. It’s actually exhilarating.

This is what it was like junior year of High School. I can try my absolute hardest and never know where I’ll end up. What colleges will I get into? Which one will I choose? 

This is the phase I’ve re-entered. I will absolutely try my hardest and I don’t even have a hint where I’ll go from here. What will I choose as my second major? Where will I intern next? Will I graduate with a job?

The first time around, I ended up pretty content. I need to just life run its course. I will let God decide my fate. Not that I’m not going to try, ‘cause the world better watch out—is how hard I’m gonna work at it. I guess all it takes is the fear factor to push me.

The automatic nervous system works better than a conscious brain.

I like to think of my brain as an arsenal.

However, my supply is currently low—alarmingly low.

I use my assault rifle when attacking exams, sniper rifle when scoring deals, grenades when defending my pride, flamethrower when scorching art, rocket launchers for going out, pistol when firing insults, and sentinel when landing a sale.

Well, they’re still here. Just rendered useless as I’m low on ammo.

I fought the war but the war won. And now I need to rebuild my supply chain.